The Best Way to Destroy Your Child’s Love of Reading

10 Mistakes Parents Make That Turn Books Into a Chore

Every parent wants to raise a reader. So why aren’t we?

You’ve heard the saying, “Readers are leaders.” It’s not just a clever rhyme—it’s backed by reality.

A five-year study of self-made millionaires found that 88% spent at least 30 minutes a day reading and educating themselves. Warren Buffett credits his success to reading voraciously, saying knowledge “builds up like compound interest.” Bill Gates reads about a book a week. Oprah Winfrey calls reading her “personal path to freedom.”

The pattern is hard to ignore: the people who shape our world are the ones who never stopped reading.

And here’s something even more important for parents to understand:

Reading for pleasure at age 15 is one of the strongest predictors of future success, stronger than test scores and even socioeconomic background.

Study after study shows that kids who read regularly for enjoyment:

• Do better academically

• Stay in school longer

• Are more likely to pursue higher levels of education

In other words, raising a reader isn’t just a nice extra; it’s one of the most powerful advantages you can give your child.

And yet, when we look around today, here’s what we see:

• 80% of U.S. families didn’t buy a single book last year (Scholastic Kids & Family Reading Report)

• Only about 20% of teens read for pleasure almost every day (NAEP reading data)

• About one-third of high school graduates will never read another book again (NEA Reading at Risk)

Never again.

So what’s going on?

Yes, screens play a huge role. Tablets have replaced books for our youngest children, and phones have replaced books for our teens. When kids are spending seven to nine hours a day on screens, there simply isn’t time left for reading—or being outdoors— or connecting with friends.

But there’s something else happening too, something quieter.

In many homes, we’re unintentionally sending the message that reading is old-fashioned. Reading is a chore. Something you have to do. Something to get through, so you can get back to the real reward: screens.

Kids pick up on that message quickly, and it sticks.

I know every parent wants to raise enthusiastic readers, so let’s look at how we may be unintentionally undermining our child’s relationship with reading and tips for what to do instead.

10 Ways to Ensure Your Child Will NOT Love Reading

1. Don’t keep age-appropriate books around.

Take inventory. Does your child actually have easy access to books he can read?

A 6-year-old shouldn’t only have picture books in her room. Replenish books like you replenish his closet when he outgrows his clothes. Aim to have five to 10 engaging, age-appropriate books she hasn’t read yet. Go to the library. Go to Goodwill. Do a book swap with friends. Let your children pick some, but you pick some, too.

Make books visible in their rooms, on the coffee table, and in the car. Make good habits easy to pursue.

2. Rely on graphic novels.

Graphic novels may keep your child looking like a reader, but he is not building the skills of one.

Graphic novels don’t require deep thinking; they do the imagining for the child, and they mimic the fast-paced stimulation of screens—quick, visual, and easy to consume. They also limit vocabulary and exposure to complex sentence structure.

That’s not how strong readers are developed.

“But graphic novels are the only thing she’ll read,” you say? Don’t settle. When we accept this as “good enough,” we lower the bar for our children and stunt their reading skills.

At some point, your children will be expected to read more than a comic book. They need to practice reading real paragraphs. Colleges don’t assign graphic novels. Your kids need to be ready.

3. Make reading feel like a chore.

Want kids to love reading for life? Make it a daily habit at home—for everyone. Parents and kids should be reading a non-school book for pleasure. That’s how you communicate that reading becomes a life-long habit and part of life, not just for school.

If reading only happens for homework—or is enforced with a timer—it quickly becomes “work.”

Nothing says “punishment” like “Go read for 30 minutes.”

Instead, make it relational: “Let’s all grab our books and read together after dinner.” Pop popcorn. Put on some soft background music—not a TV show—and sit together.

Now reading becomes about connection, not compliance.

4. Replace books with screens in the car for trips and errands.

Car rides, waiting rooms, errands—these are golden reading opportunities.

If your child gets carsick, use audiobooks. But don’t default to screens. Remind her to grab a book or kids’ magazine before you pile in the car.

Fifteen minutes a day adds up to over a million extra words a year.

5. Never read yourself.

Your kids are watching you.

If they never see you with a real book, they won’t believe reading matters. This is one of the most powerful shifts you can make: let them see you read.

• Get a newspaper or a magazine delivered to your house.

• Talk about the books you are reading often.

• Keep a book in the car and read while you wait for school pick up.

You will be shocked at how your kids will follow your lead when you make print material part of your family culture.

6. Don’t give books as gifts.

We give what we value.

Make books part of birthdays and holidays. Write a note inside. Make it meaningful. One year, we gave our son a set of the “Who Was…” biography series. That kicked off his reading habit.

Screens make terrible gifts.

7. Show no interest in what they’re reading.

Ask about her books at dinner. “What’s happening in your story right now?” She will be so excited to share.

Even better? Ask if you can read it when she’s done.

That moment matters more than you think.

8. Skip the library and bookstore.

Kids need to experience books, not just be assigned them.

Let them wander. Sit. Explore. Read. Those quiet, cozy spaces matter. Work it into your weekly routine.

Does he have his own library card? It’s time for one.

9. Stop reading aloud too early.

Kids never outgrow being read to.

Reading aloud builds comprehension, attention, and connection. It also creates some of the best family memories.

Start a book series together. Dad, it’s your turn to read. It works.

10. Use screen time as a reward for reading.

This is the big one.

When you say, “Read first, then you can play video games or have your phone,” you are sending a loud message: reading is the chore and screens are the reward.

If screens always win, books don’t stand a chance.

Here’s the truth: 

Developing a love of reading is one of the best investments you can make in your child’s future. Unfortunately, reading often is the first to go when screens, especially handheld ones, are introduced.

Meghan Cox Gurdon, author of The Enchanted Hour: The Miraculous Power of Reading Aloud in the Age of Distraction—A Neuroscience Guide for Parents on Brain Development and Family Bonds, writes, “The act of reading together secures people to one another, creating order and connection, as if we were quilt squares tacked together with threads made of stories. That’s not just another metaphor, as a team of neuroscientists at Princeton has discovered. Even as reader and listener are enjoying their bouquet of neurochemicals ... their brain activity is synchronizing, creating literal order and connection in a process known as neural coupling.”

If your children already enjoy reading, you’re on the right track. If not, try some simple changes. The most effective step you can take? Limit recreational screen time and eliminate exposure to toxic screen use (video games and smartphones). This creates the environment where reading can flourish. If your child is obsessed with screens, it might require more persistence on your part. But don’t give up. Keep pushing forward. I know this works because I’ve not only lived it, but I've also seen countless families succeed.

It’s never too late to shift your family’s approach to screens and reading. Start tonight after dinner with a family read-along. Go pop the popcorn and let me know how it goes!

Melanie Hempe, RN, is the founder of ScreenStrong, a nonprofit organization, and the author of the Kids’ Brains and Screens Series for students and parents. She is dedicated to preventing and reversing childhood screen addictions by providing scientific evidence and community for families around the globe. Her educational material is filled with everything she wished she had known before her oldest child suffered from a screen addiction. ScreenStrong has created what every family needs—education and community—to help teens avoid toxic screen harms throughout adolescence so they can reach their full potential.

Visit ScreenStrong.org to learn more and see our KBS offerings, including our new Adventures of Super Brain for elementary schoolers. Join the Community that is saving childhood.

• Clark, C., & Rumbold, K. (2006). Reading for Pleasure: A Research Overview. National Literacy Trust. https://eric.ed.gov/?id=ED496343

• Sullivan, A., & Brown, M. (2013). Reading for pleasure and progress in vocabulary and mathematics. British Educational Research Journal, 39(6), 125-145. (Note: Sullivan & Brown report longitudinal links between leisure reading and later attainment.)

• OECD (2010). PISA 2009 Results: Learning to Learn — Students’ Engagement, Strategies and Practices (Volume III). Organization for Economic Co‑operation and Development. (PISA analyses show reading frequency/enjoyment correlates with literacy and attainment.)

• McGeown, S. P., Goodwin, H., Henderson, L., & Wright, P. (2012). Free-reading and reading engagement: A longitudinal study of reading for pleasure and attainment. British Journal of Educational Psychology, 82(3), 411–428.

• Clark, C., & Teravainen-Goff, A. (2018). Children’s and Young People’s Reading in 2016: Findings from the National Literacy Trust’s annual survey. National Literacy Trust. (National survey evidence on reading frequency and outcomes.)

• Crede, F., & Kuncel, N. R. (2008). Study habits, skills, and attitudes: The third pillar supporting collegiate academic performance. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 3(6), 425–453. (Meta-analysis including leisure reading as an academic predictor.)