The parent pressure is real. My husband and I allow limited screen time in the evenings but my high school freshman children do not have phones. Yes, you read that correctly, my high schoolers do not (and will not have) phones for a while. We made it through middle school, where the peer pressure is probably at its worst! We did it and so can you!!
We knew going into this phone free life for our kids, they were probably going to look weird. We spoke to them truthfully about the havoc of phone use on their developing brains, the addiction, the poor sleep quality of their peers, the apathy, the disrespect for school and teachers (and life) and that we wanted more for them since their brains are going through the most important development (middle school) of their lives. We wanted to live in the present with the world around them.
We checked our on phone usage at the "door". Absolutely no usage when eating- at home or out. Our family is the priority, we talk, we engage, we ask questions, we share stories and interests. If we are using our phones, when a kid enters the room, we put it down and engage in conversation or just smile, and wait for them to initiate a chat.
This is possible! I promise you. Both of my high schoolers were out when I got home from work, on their bikes somewhere. One just got home. We talked- she was out with friends in the neighborhood, she had been out since after lunch. She grabbed a snack and is now reading. She'll have time after dinner to play some X-Box, but she won't play for long. She tires of it quickly. The other is still out enjoying the lovely spring weather with friends. He'll get time after dinner too. He would be on all night if we weren't more firm, but he knows why we restrict it. This is the time to talk and model all the healthy habits you want to share with your kids!
This is exactly what I needed to read today, thank you!!
The parent pressure is real. My husband and I allow limited screen time in the evenings but my high school freshman children do not have phones. Yes, you read that correctly, my high schoolers do not (and will not have) phones for a while. We made it through middle school, where the peer pressure is probably at its worst! We did it and so can you!!
We knew going into this phone free life for our kids, they were probably going to look weird. We spoke to them truthfully about the havoc of phone use on their developing brains, the addiction, the poor sleep quality of their peers, the apathy, the disrespect for school and teachers (and life) and that we wanted more for them since their brains are going through the most important development (middle school) of their lives. We wanted to live in the present with the world around them.
We checked our on phone usage at the "door". Absolutely no usage when eating- at home or out. Our family is the priority, we talk, we engage, we ask questions, we share stories and interests. If we are using our phones, when a kid enters the room, we put it down and engage in conversation or just smile, and wait for them to initiate a chat.
This is possible! I promise you. Both of my high schoolers were out when I got home from work, on their bikes somewhere. One just got home. We talked- she was out with friends in the neighborhood, she had been out since after lunch. She grabbed a snack and is now reading. She'll have time after dinner to play some X-Box, but she won't play for long. She tires of it quickly. The other is still out enjoying the lovely spring weather with friends. He'll get time after dinner too. He would be on all night if we weren't more firm, but he knows why we restrict it. This is the time to talk and model all the healthy habits you want to share with your kids!